I get a lot of side thoughts traveling a lone. I have a constant battle in my brain on what to do, where to go, can I do it, everything. These are some that flutter through my brain often.
***here's the really real talk. Brace yourselves, its gonna be a bumpy ride***
-I'm exhausted. I just want a regular schedule and a regular day.. Or more, I would like a home base and take long weekend trips to different countries rather than take everything everywhere to every location.
-Do I want to just call it good? Head to Croatia, stay there until my little monkey arrives and call it good? But what about all the places I want to see, things I want to do... Ughh the debate goes on and my constant FOMO (fear of missing out) takes over. But I'm so tired and so ready to just get to a familiar place that I know ill love.. But isn't that the fun? Figuring out what countries you love? The struggle is real and eating me alive.
-Am I some sort of failure because I decide to stop with the exploration? Everyone else I've met is and can do it, why am I struggling so much?
-I dont want to regret NOT going to places and seeing the world, but I'm just so tired and run down. It makes it worse if I don't like a city. I didn't know I would like the city, but it definitely makes things a lot worse.
-I LOVE traveling a lone, but I almost wish I had someone too. At the same time I mostly dont... I think just the idea of going to other places that may have more trouble with English freaks me out and thus I wish I had someone to struggle with me.
- navigating countries with different languages on the sign is harder.. Especially when people are not very helpful.. Another stress factor.
-actually, I'm not worried about money... I just hate spending money no matter where I am. In the states or a different country.. Thats just being a Jovanovich.
-its not all butterflies and rainbows when traveling alone. Its more like ripping your hair out and hoping your not homeless with the beautiful breaks of enjoyment in between. So basically everyday life in any country..
- how the hell am I suppose to navigate more foreign countries on my own! Thats the worst! If I'm gonna get lost in another country I would so rather get lost with a partner!
-I think I'm gonna hate parts of Germany, but feel like I need to visit there.. Actually I feel like I HAVE to visit other countries even if I'm skeptical because people recommend them and again with the FOMO...
-traveling a lone is a struggle. Not easy. Some times I want to punch everyone, some times I want to cry, sometimes I just want to go home and lay on the couch, sometimes I want to never stop traveling.
-knowing I want to travel the world, knowing I've done a lot and there's places I've fallen in love with. Finding a place to stop and stay may not be so bad? Have I hit my limit? But I don't want to have a limit.. I want to go and be completely fine the whole time. Is there a point in every travelers journey where they realize their limit and accept it? Or am I just the only one? Probably not the only one, but I want to be as tough and courageous as the people who did this forever, just drifting from place to place, having amazing times and rarely, if ever get this feeling of 'okay I think I'm done and ready to be done for a while'
-I assumed I would get that 'this is my true passion' kind of feeling and I don't think I have that which actually just makes me really upset. I wanted so bad to have that feeling that this is what I need to do forever because I love it so much, and I just don't have that feeling. I LOVE this experience and I LOVE traveling, but it hasn't hit me like I feel a passion should. I will travel to cool places for the rest of my life, but I don't know that I will do it like I am now. Maybe that's where my limit comes in. I love traveling but maybe for two months at a time? Or if I live in a different country and have that home base?
-Do I want to go to Germany and Prague? Yes of course I do, but it also freaks me out. But I've already done the republic of Ireland, northern Ireland, Scotland, London, Belgium and headed to Amsterdam... Why do I think I can't do other places?
-why is this so hard! Why can't someone tell me what to do! I miss traveling with family when that stress didn't rely solely on me! And if I didn't like a place it was fine because at least I was with family and friends!
-everyone makes their travels sound like everything went smoothly and they had no doubt and break downs. Every place they went to they tell you all about the good, or the crazy stories that may be terrible but make it sounds so interesting. Maybe that's what makes me the most frustrated and upset is that, the idea that everyone has had amazing trips and I'm struggling. It seems like I can't do it right, but there is no 'right' way to travel.. I guess you just do it. No one will have the same travel experience but am I somehow doing it wrong?
*****THE STRUGGLE IS REAL*****
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